sasquatch has a name. it’s chrystal. cristal. krystalle. chris.tuhl.
i liked it better when you were nameless, sass. when you were nameless and just stomping above my head. now we’ve talked on many occasions and you’re nice. i’d totally be friends with you. you suck for that. why can’t you just be a horrible bitch and have offensive amounts of body hair? you even asked how my dog was in the elevator this morning! do you know who he is? do you know that he’s the sad howler who you complained to the maintenance guy about a few months ago? i wonder if that look of realization was real or imagined by me when you asked if i let him run around the apartment while i was at work and i said no, he has to be in his crate. i swear i saw your face drop. just a little. you know what’s up. and now you know my name. and i know yours. sasquatch.
